Skip to main contentA logo with &quat;the muse&quat; in dark blue text.
Advice / Career Paths / Career Change

How to Deal with a Layoff: Tips From Mental Health Professionals

Getty Images
Getty Images

Layoffs are becoming increasingly common across a variety of sectors and industries—but if you get laid off yourself, it’s a sting that hurts no matter how common it is. The impact can be so much deeper than job loss.

“Whether it was something you saw coming or something that took you by surprise, losing a job brings up a lot of feelings that can impact your mental health,” says Blaine Stephens, a licensed professional counselor with Thriveworks who specializes in life transitions, coping skills, and stress.

It can feel impossible to deal with the mental health-related fallout—and navigate your layoff in a way that not only helps you land on your feet and find your next opportunity. But experts say there are things you can do to support your health, happiness, and well-being in the days, weeks, and months following a layoff. We asked Stephens and others for their best advice. .

How layoffs may impact your mental health

Before we jump into how to navigate a layoff, let’s touch on how a layoff can impact your mental health.

External losses and financial stress

“There are the external losses and their impacts to mental health,” says Sarilee Kahn, PhD, LCSW, a psychosocial consultant currently providing pro bono counseling and low-fee support to laid off government and USAID workers.

For example, an unexpected layoff can jeopardize your finances. Losing your job might also mean losing health insurance—and those financial and medical losses can cause a lot of stress, which ultimately influences your mental state.

“These losses can trigger further problems, such as the potential loss of safe shelter, healthcare, and the ability to meet basic human needs for themselves and their dependents,” Kahn says. “Such challenges can cause enormous and unrelenting stress.”

Identity and self-worth challenges

It’s not just the external, tangible losses that come with a layoff that can cause damage; there are also internal shifts that can be incredibly difficult to deal with—most notably issues surrounding identity.

“Many people connect their identity to their careers—so when they lose their jobs, it can leave them feeling confused and unstable,” says Ivy Ellis, LCSW. “They wonder, ‘Who am I if I’m not an insert-job-title?’”

This loss of identity can also drive self-criticism. “People often begin to feel really bad about themselves,” Ellis says. “Their inner critic goes into overdrive”—and they’ll spend significant time and energy beating themselves up and/or feeling like a failure (neither of which is going to help them feel better or find a new job).

Emotional turbulence and grief

A layoff can throw your emotional world into a tailspin.

“It's a major loss, and can bring up a lot of complex feelings,” Ellis says. “People go through all the stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, and depression. Their feelings change day to day and moment to moment.”

The impact on job searching and moving forward

Mental health can take a hit when navigating a layoff—which can make it harder to bounce back and find your next opportunity.

“The job search process can be long and grueling, and it takes a lot of resilience to cope through the rejection and silence,” Ellis says. “If someone is already feeling down about themself, they might stop looking for a job too quickly. They may doubt whether they're even a good fit for the jobs they find, and that could stop them from even submitting an application.”

It might feel like the best strategy is to hide in a cocoon of self-doubt and PTSD. For many people, it’s a natural tendency.

“Faced with these pressures, people may go into survival mode, embodying fight, flight, freeze, or collapse modes,” Khan says. “As a result, they find it difficult to do the short-, medium-, and long-term planning required to move ahead [and find a new role].”

Tips for dealing with the fallout of a layoff

Don’t succumb to the cozy cocoon of avoidance: There ways to deal with the challenges and endure a layoff and its aftermath in a way that supports improved mental health and a successful job search.

Cut yourself some slack

You don’t need self-criticism during a hard time; what you need is to cut yourself some slack.

“Self-compassion is a vital building block for building up our resilience,” Stephens says. “It helps us bounce back faster when things don’t go our way.”

Being kind to yourself will help minimize some of the negative impact of the layoff—and will help you get back on your feet more quickly. So if and when you hear your inner critic speaking up, notice it, acknowledge it—and then shift your internal dialogue towards something more loving and compassionate.

For example, let’s say you’re stuck on the thought, “I’m a failure because I was laid off.” When you catch yourself thinking that way, challenge it with a more compassionate perspective like, “layoffs can happen to anyone—and being laid off doesn’t say anything about my worth.” Or “Being laid off doesn’t mean I’m a failure; it just means I’m a human going through a hard time.”

The more often you replace self-critical thoughts with self-compassionate ones, the less you’ll hear that negative voice in your head. And the better positioned you’ll be to get over the shock of your layoff and move on with confidence.

Embrace the mantra “this is temporary”

When a layoff happens, it can feel…permanent. As if you’ll be in the throes of this experience forever. But it’s not permanent—and if you want to effectively manage your feelings and emotional experience post-layoff, it’s important to remind yourself of that fact every day.

“Remember that this is a temporary setback—not the end of the road,” Stephens says.

Whenever you find yourself overwhelmed by your post-layoff experience—and feeling like things will always be this way—remind yourself that while this feels overwhelming now, you will get to the other side.

If you can, mentally revisit a situation that once felt overwhelming and consuming that now is nothing but a memory—for example, a past breakup or a previous job loss. Reminding yourself that you have felt this way before and made it to the other side will help you find strength—and tap into the knowledge that you will get through this as well.

Express your feelings

Getting laid off can bring up big feelings: grief, anxiety, fear, depression, anger…the list goes on. And experiencing these feelings is totally normal. “It’s absolutely normal to experience a mix of emotions when being laid off,” Stephens says.

Even though these feelings are normal, they can also be extremely uncomfortable—and you may be tempted to avoid hard emotions (and the discomfort that goes along with them). But if you want to get through it, giving yourself the time and space to feel, express, and validate those emotions is an absolute must. Don’t bury them.

“It's important to acknowledge your emotions and validate them,” Ellis says, “instead of trying to ignore how hard this is.”

So, how do you do that?

“Find avenues to actively and safely express feelings, a little at a time,” Kahn says. “Some people journal, write letters they don’t send, punch pillows or punching bags to release anger, or process with trusted friends who can listen without judgment.”

And because challenging emotions and stress can activate the nervous system, it’s also important to make time for activities that can help you better manage your emotions and stay calm. “Engage in activities to calm the nervous system and foster a sense of safety, like meditation, simple breathwork, walks in nature, or grounding exercises,” Kahn says.

Invest in other parts of your life

A layoff can lead to a full-blown identity crisis—as if losing your job has made you lose yourself. But here’s the truth: “A job does not define you, and neither does a layoff,” Stephens says.

There are so many other things outside of work that make you who you are—and one of the best ways to reclaim your identity is to tap into those other things and “find other ways to express your identity,” Kahn says.

For example, are your relationships important to you? Carve out time to spend with the people you care about the most. Is there a hobby you absolutely loved—but stopped engaging in because you were too busy with work? Sign up for a class to get back into the swing of things and connect with other people who are just as passionate about painting or rock climbing or whatever you’re passionate about.

“When a job or career seems to end, it’s an opportunity to build an identity and sense of purpose that’s not tied solely to work but also to yourself,” Kahn says.

The more you invest in other parts of your identity, the more you’ll remember that you’re not your job—and the better you’ll feel as a result.

Create (and stick to!) a schedule

“It’s easy to lose track of time when we don’t have the structure that a job typically provides and requires of us,” Stephens says.

But floating through each day without any sense of structure or purpose can be destabilizing—and can exacerbate some of the challenging feelings (like isolation or depression) that can come with a layoff.

That’s why it’s important to create your own daily schedule. “Having a self-implemented routine can be an absolute game-changer in these situations,” Stephens says. “Set aside time for the things that are important to you—whether that’s job searching, getting outside, exercising, or doing something creative. This routine helps build the structure that your brain craves to feel more in control, and by extension, less anxious.”

Plan at least part of your daily schedule around getting out of the house. “Without an office environment, whether online or in-person, you may start to feel isolated,” Ellis says. “Spending some time in a coffee shop or a library while you look for jobs can make a difference, since you'll be surrounded by other people. Not only will this help reduce loneliness, but studies show that being around others can actually inspire you to be more productive.”

Creating (and sticking!) to a daily schedule will help replace the structure you had while working—which, in turn, can help you both be more productive and better deal with the emotional challenges that come along with layoffs.

Determine the next right job for you—then go after that job

Getting laid off does not feel good. But that doesn’t mean that there’s no good to be found in the experience.

“We often rush through life without stopping to think about whether our current job is the right fit,” Ellis says. Getting laid off gives you an opportunity to really reflect on what you liked (and didn’t like) about your previous role—and put thought into what you want your career to look like moving forward.

“Take this time to think about what you really want. Consider things like the hours you want to work, the salary you need, and the tasks you enjoy,” Ellis says. Then, once you have a clear idea of your ideal role, you can use it to guide your job search. “You can be more intentional about finding the right fit,” she says.

​​Get right back into the workforce with a job you love—browse open jobs on The Muse »

Ask your support system for help…

We’re not meant to go through hard things alone. “Social support is critical to overall health and resilience, especially during tough times,” Kahn says.

So when you find yourself dealing with the challenges (emotional and otherwise) that come with a layoff, reach out for help.

Let your friends, family, and loved ones know when you’re struggling. Allow them to show up for you—whether that’s with emotional support (for example, listening when you need to cry or vent) or more practical help (like updating your resume or connecting you with someone in their network that might have a role for you). Prioritize spending time with people—even (or maybe especially) when you don’t want to.

Surrounding yourself with people you love (and allowing them to show you love and support as you navigate a really challenging time) will remind you that you’re not alone. And that, in turn, can make the experience feel a little less heavy.

…and reach out to professionals when necessary

It might also be helpful to seek professional support after experiencing a layoff.

On the job front, you might consider getting in touch with a career coach. “Career coaches are excellent at helping you update your resume and applying for jobs,” Ellis says. “People often get stuck with the next steps and may lose motivation, but having an outside person can help hold you accountable.”

And on the mental health front, a therapist can be invaluable in helping you get through the toughest parts of your layoff. “If you find yourself stuck in a rut with these issues, don’t hesitate to reach out for help from a licensed therapist,” Stephens says. “Therapists can help you maintain focus and keep things moving in the right direction.”

Take care of yourself—and your mental health

Dealing with a layoff can be hugely challenging. But it’s important to remember that, with the right approach, you can—and will!—get through it.

“Getting laid off is tough for almost everyone it happens to, but it’s a temporary hurdle,” Stephens says. “Focus on your mental health, build a routine, and stay connected—these tips can help you get back on track for your next exciting opportunity. It may take some time, but you can do this!”