We’ve all been on the receiving end of those emails that literally inspire smoke to start billowing out of our ears.
One minute, you’re totally calm, cool, and collected. But, when your inbox dings? That one seemingly innocent message pushes you right over the edge.
Before you know it, you’ve fired off a brutal and curt response that says something like, “Seriously, Janet, how many times do I have to tell you to swap out the number in the top corner of the spreadsheet?! This is getting RIDICULOUS.”
Cringe, right? Typically, you’re wise enough to take a pause and collect yourself before responding. But, today? Well, Janet and her spreadsheet incompetence got the best of you—and you replied before you had a chance to rein in your own short fuse.
You know that your email was rude, and perhaps a bit more aggressive than the conversation called for. So, how can you backpedal out of this situation—without garnering a reputation as the co-worker who’s going to lose his cool at a moment’s notice?
Well, start by replying (as soon as possible!) to that same email with a message that looks a lot like this one.
Email Template How to Follow Up After Sending a Rude Email
Hey [Name],
I want to apologize for the email I sent you earlier.
It’s no excuse, but it’s been one of those days when [reason you had such a short fuse]. I snapped at you when I had absolutely no reason to, and I’m so sorry for my [adjective] message.
The next time [description of circumstances that made you snap], I’ll make sure to take a pause before responding—so I don’t take my own frustrations out on you.
Sorry once again!
Best,
[Your Name]
In our example of that pesky Janet and her perceived inability to fill out that routine spreadsheet correctly, here’s what a follow-up email would look like with the necessary details filled in.
A Sample
Hey Janet,
I want to apologize for the email I sent you earlier.
It’s no excuse, but it’s been one of those days when everything is piling up. I snapped at you when I had absolutely no reason to, and I’m sorry for my insensitive message.
The next time my to-do list starts to get the better of me, I’ll make sure to take a pause before responding—so I don’t take my own frustrations out on you.
Sorry once again!
Best,
Kat
Here’s an important thing to note: While you can and should provide a brief explanation for why your response was rude, keep that fairly general and resist the urge to rattle off a bunch of excuses.
The recipient of your overly angry message probably won’t care about the fact that you stubbed your toe that morning, you have bad indigestion, and your car wouldn’t start on the way to your client lunch—he or she just wants to know that you’re aware of your insensitivity and are willing to be accountable for your own actions.
Unfortunately, there’s no way for you to take that bad-mannered email of yours back (that’d be nice though, wouldn’t it?). But, immediately following up with an apologetic email should help to smooth things over and undo some of that damage you caused with your far-too-rapid response time.