100+ Get-to-Know-You Questions That Don’t Involve Desert Islands

You’re standing at a party where you only know the host or maybe that one friend who always ends up running “just a few minutes late,” and you can’t think of a single thing to say to the people near you. Or maybe you’re working with a new group on a project at work, or you’ve matched with someone on Bumble and now you’re staring at a blank message screen.

Let’s face it—it can be tough to think of a conversation starter that goes beyond, “What’d you do this weekend?” or, “It’s a little cold today, isn’t it?” 

So we’ve put together a list of get-to-know-you questions that dig a little deeper and will actually teach you something about people—or at least get a conversation going. After all, does anybody really care about your packing preferences for that hypothetical desert island?

Throw out a couple of these prompts (many of which we actually use right here at The Muse) at a team meeting or party when the small talk lulls and get ready to bond on a whole new level.

If you’re looking for more ways to get people comfortable, we also have icebreaker questions and questions that will make small talk easier, as well as icebreaker games and team-building activities.

Here are a few queries that’ll work in almost any setting where you might meet someone new (just introduce yourself first!). They’ll help you quickly learn some basic info about a person and their interests—and hopefully kick-start some good conversations.

1. How do you like to spend your time outside of work or school?
2. Do you have any hobbies?
3. Do you collect anything?
4. Are you an early bird or a night owl?
5. How do you like to start your day?
6. How do you like to end your day?
7. What kinds of activities drain you?
8. What kinds of activities energize you?
9. What’s one thing you’re learning now or learned recently?
10. What’s something you saw recently that made you smile?
11. What’s something you saw recently that made you laugh?
12. What’s something you’ve done, but you’ll never do again?
13. What are you passionate about?
14. What’s your guilty pleasure?
15. When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?
16. What’s your ideal way to spend your weekends?
17. Are you reading anything interesting right now?
18. Are you bingeing any shows?
19. Do you have any pets? (Of course, followed by: Do you have any pictures?)

Asking about someone’s favorites can be a great gateway to getting to know them. After all, most people enjoy talking about things they’re passionate about—just make sure you ask follow-up questions or share your own experiences.

Work can be one of the most common contexts in which you’ll need to get to know someone—if you’re having lunch or a one-on-one meeting with a colleague, for example, or you’re at a professional networking event. Well, these questions cover nearly every possible work-related topic.

Here are a few questions you can ask people in school—whether you’re a student yourself, a teacher, or someone interacting with students. Just make sure the questions you choose account for what kind of school you’re in (i.e., elementary school students don’t have majors and college students, unfortunately, don’t have recess).

You want to dig a little deeper to understand who a person really is. These questions go beyond lighthearted icebreakers to give you some better insight into what makes that person tick.

These “What would you do?” questions can get people talking about some surprising topics—and give you great insight into who they are and what matters to them.

If you’re looking for a quirky or upbeat way to kick off a team meeting with some bonding or even just get a one-on-one conversation rolling, these fun, unexpected, and low-pressure icebreaker questions should do the trick.

Regina Borsellino contributed writing, reporting, and/or advice to this article.